{"id":42,"date":"2017-06-27T08:56:32","date_gmt":"2017-06-27T08:56:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/?p=42"},"modified":"2017-06-28T22:05:34","modified_gmt":"2017-06-28T22:05:34","slug":"my-new-cat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/my-new-cat\/","title":{"rendered":"My New Cat"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m half machine. I&#8217;m a monster. Across from where? What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221; There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor.<\/p>\n<p>I hear the jury&#8217;s still out on science. I don&#8217;t criticize you! And if you&#8217;re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. I&#8217;m a monster. No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you.<\/p>\n<p>Guy&#8217;s a pro. Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. <strong> Did you enjoy your meal, Mom?<\/strong> <em> You drank it fast enough.<\/em> I&#8217;ve opened a door here that I regret.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s why you always leave a note! No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer&#8217;s questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide. I&#8217;m a monster. Oh, you&#8217;re gonna be in a coma, all right.<\/p>\n<p>Army had half a day. But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn&#8217;t that mean anything anymore? No\u2026 but I&#8217;d like to be asked! Not tricks, Michael, illusions. There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor.<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>That&#8217;s what it said on &#8216;Ask Jeeves.&#8217;<\/li>\n<li>Michael!<\/li>\n<li>Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Michael! Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough. There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor. There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor.<\/p>\n<p>I care deeply for nature. That&#8217;s what it said on &#8216;Ask Jeeves.&#8217; There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor. Bad news. Andy Griffith turned us down. He didn&#8217;t like his trailer.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Not tricks, Michael, illusions.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s called &#8216;taking advantage.&#8217; It&#8217;s what gets you ahead in life.<\/li>\n<li>He&#8217;ll want to use your yacht, and I don&#8217;t want this thing smelling like fish.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you&#8217;ll have more fun. No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer&#8217;s questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide.<\/p>\n<p>First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn&#8217;t date magicians. What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221; Army had half a day. What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221; But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn&#8217;t that mean anything anymore?<\/p>\n<p>Not tricks, Michael, illusions. Marry me. That&#8217;s what it said on &#8216;Ask Jeeves.&#8217; I don&#8217;t criticize you! And if you&#8217;re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Across from where? Michael! Whoa, this guy&#8217;s straight? We just call it a sausage.<\/p>\n<p>No\u2026 but I&#8217;d like to be asked! Well, what do you expect, mother? No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. I&#8217;m afraid I just blue myself. Not tricks, Michael, illusions.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve opened a door here that I regret. There&#8217;s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. We just call it a sausage. Marry me. Guy&#8217;s a pro. There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor.<\/p>\n<p>There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor. Army had half a day. It&#8217;s called &#8216;taking advantage.&#8217; It&#8217;s what gets you ahead in life.<\/p>\n<p>I don&#8217;t criticize you! And if you&#8217;re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense. Across from where? Oh, you&#8217;re gonna be in a coma, all right. We just call it a sausage. Really? Did nothing cancel?<\/p>\n<p>Oh, you&#8217;re gonna be in a coma, all right. That&#8217;s why you always leave a note! I&#8217;ve opened a door here that I regret. Across from where?<\/p>\n<p>Not tricks, Michael, illusions. What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221; Guy&#8217;s a pro. I&#8217;ve opened a door here that I regret. There&#8217;s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. I care deeply for nature.<\/p>\n<p>No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer&#8217;s questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide. There&#8217;s so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m half machine. I&#8217;m a monster. Across from where? What&#8217;s Spanish for &#8220;I know you speak English?&#8221; There&#8217;s only one man I&#8217;ve ever called a coward, and that&#8217;s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I&#8217;m calling you is a television actor. I hear the jury&#8217;s still out on science. I don&#8217;t criticize you! And if you&#8217;re worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense.<a class=\"more-link button\" href=\"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/my-new-cat\/\">Read Now<\/a><\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":43,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-42","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/22\/2017\/06\/antoinette_13.jpg?fit=1920%2C1280&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8SoRU-G","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/43"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themes.pankogut.com\/moroseta\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}